Cooking a home, Lina's and my project, was created as a cookbook with a twist. As she described in her blog post, we went through a very interesting process that led to the final product, which I feel very lucky to write about today…
Their stories…
The cookbook is filled with colors, drawings, stories and mouth-watering recipes, all gathered to really convey the voices of the wonderful people we have had the privilege to meet. The colors, the blue and yellow (of course relating to the Kosovo flag), the drawings representing small symbols of the food in Kosovo and of course, the pictures are an attempt to capture the beauty of those moments. A picture is said to be worth a thousand words, but we quickly realized that we needed more, so much more to really paint the message we wanted to convey in the cookbook.
Hoping that it would be accessible for all. Its organization might seem a bit nonexistent, with a story here and there, in between two recipes. In reality though, it was made to paint the conversations we had with people. Sometimes where we cited a few ingredients, this was followed by part of their reality, their truth and lives, then often followed by something along the lines of “oh! You should also add this ingredient. It would taste great!”.
When we came back to Amsterdam, we sat in our 27 m2 rooms and we realized that we had collected many different stories and conversations. And the topic that came back the most relates to home.
The focus of the project was the similarities between the communities rather than the differences. A main similarity we have found is that home is common for everyone, no matter the community, the age or region of Kosovo. It is something that all can align under. Home is what connects it all. We decided to look at food, and the role it plays in making a place home, its power to connect individuals. It is not only a necessity, it is also something around which people sit down and put things aside, at least for a little while.
Food as a peace building tool can be observed through the lens of home, as food helps “cook a home”.
We have learnt many different lessons through the incredible experience in Kosovo and our project:
1. The voices of the people
We arrived in Kosovo with a lot of historical knowledge, as well as learning about the country through media, which depicts a specific narrative of Kosovo. By talking with people (through organizations or random encounters) we realized the importance of giving space to their voices, listening to their narratives and the importance of those voices being conveyed and heard by many. Often it simply requires the desire to listen and people are happy to talk about their truth.
2. Resilience and perseverance
We had the chance to meet people who have shown great resilience and perseverance in all situations. People who keep going no matter the challenges. People who fight for what they believe is right, for their values.
Perseverance is a subject that came back a lot during our trip, one of the women we met for our meeting with the Women’s Network said something that really struck me and demonstrated that veryperseverance: “We become the nightmare of our institutions”.
Marco, a Kosovo Serb we were lucky to meet told us that his house burned down twice, but he never gave up and his house is now bigger and greater than ever.
The lesson learned thanks to the people we have met is something I would like to apply in my life. Something that is boosting me for my future endeavors.
3. The importance of trust
Before going to Kosovo and starting the research for our project, I had never really done qualitative research. I have learned the importance of creating trust in order to collect precious and valuable information. During the research, we realized that it is important to give a bit of yourself, to share your truth, your reality, in order to hope to receive something in return. Sometimes, we gave and did not receive anything back. And that was ok. Silence is loud at times. We have been taught by our instructor to listen to what is not being told. So that loud silence meant something too.
The lesson learned about qualitative research can and will also be applied in my personal life – always be real, true to myself, peel away the masks and games. I also believe it is a beautiful thing to give to people without expecting something in return.
4. Learning to truly listen
Throughout our research during our trip we discussed with individuals who had opinions very different from my own. Opinions that I did not necessarily agree with. To be truly present in the conversations and to cherish the precious information people were willing to share with us, I had to learn to listen. Without letting my biases and beliefs get in the way of the intimate, precious sharing of people's lives with us, with me.
Individuals are entitled to have their own opinions, and that is ok. We were simply there to listen and take it all in.
I had one of those “you had to be there” conversations, and explained this important lesson I was taught during the trip with a friend. They told me, “you have to really be practical to be able to put your opinions aside to be present and to really listen.”. Then I realized that no, it is not about being practical, it is a very humbling experience to have someone tell you about things so intimate. So humbling that they took their time to talk to us, to me. It is not about being practical. I think it really is about respect and love. Human to human. With the great realization that no one owns the truth, and that it is ok to just listen to each other.
It is a lesson that I will keep applying to my personal life. My family would argue that I am very opinionated, and I am not the one to usually (excuse my language) shut up and listen.
I read one time that people “listen” to answer and reply but they do not listen to really understand, I think this was right in my case. But I am determined to do better. To really be present. To cherish the conversations. To cherish that people are sharing part of their truth with me.
5. The passion
Lina and I agree that this project, all of its process from the idea, to the experiences during the trip as well as the creation of the final product has sparked something in us: passion.
We were both very invested in the entire process, welcoming all of its lessons.
The individuals we have met have inspired us so deeply that we promised ourselves to do more of those on our individual travels in the future.
We also realized the importance of such a project, that is not academic. We realized that it can really have a social impact, helping the voices be heard further and further. Maybe teaching others about another narrative of Kosovo.
All of this passion must be used: I am ready to start working on a project that has been living in my head (rent-free) for months now. I came back from Kosovo, recharged, inspired and if I must say it, ready to take on the world!
6. The importance of home
By talking with the people of Kosovo, we realized that of course we all had different personal and historical backgrounds, but one thing we all had in common is HOME. We realized that home is not only under a roof. Home is the people, the sounds, the scents, the spices, the food. All of it is home. And for our interviewees, Kosovo is home.
It is something that everyone had in common, no matter their differences, the tensions, the communities. Home is one thing that brings people together.
I realized it is the same for my home. Mauritius. During my long travels back home (around 16h in general), I usually have two flights. During the second, my creole is back on my tongue. I look around constantly to see if I can find my people. As if my entire self, knows that I am going to be home soon. That my roots are calling me. As soon as I step out of the plane, I am home again. Back on my motherland.
Home is so much more than a roof.
We looked at food as a peace building tool through the lens of home. As food, no matter how ordinary it seems, is what you feed to your people, to your loved ones. It is what you were fed as a child. And often, I realized, someone’s favorite food is associated to a specific person, memory. Associated with love.
It is so deeply laced with love.
When we were in Kosovo, we saw this abandoned Serbian Orthodox Church a few times a day when going back and forth to the meeting point, NEWBORN. This beautiful building, a safe haven for the stray dogs who found comfort under its shade, on the comfy wild grass.
This place that I saw so many times a day. Its view comforted me. Strangely it gave me a sense of home, so far away from home.
So I keep going back to this picture. To its beauty. I am so scared of forgetting the amazing adventure we had the incredible chance to experience. Looking back at this picture, I realize that yes, I might forget some details, but I believe that all of it is tattooed in me. That the lessons I have been taught are mine forever and I will keep cherishing all. Of. it.
And it all ties together, sharing with you all part of my truth.
Bref, à bientôt.
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